Last Updated on June 16, 2025 by Ellen Christian
The older I get, the more I crave peace. Not just quiet, but real, deep peace—the kind that comes when you stop chasing and start breathing. Life after 45 is supposed to be the time when things settle, but for many of us, the demands haven’t slowed at all.
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Slowing Down is the Secret to a Happier Life
Between work, family, home life, and trying to take care of ourselves, it can feel like the to-do list never ends. But here’s the truth I’ve come to learn: slowing down isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity. And it just might be the secret to a happier, more grounded life.
Country Living Taught Me to Breathe Again
There’s something about living in the country that whispers, “take your time.” Whether it’s the way the sunrise creeps slowly over the trees, or the quiet hum of birds in the morning, nature doesn’t rush. And when I finally started paying attention, I realized I didn’t have to rush either.
It didn’t happen overnight. I’m someone who always felt like I had to do more, be more, check one more thing off the list before I could rest. But living closer to the land changed that. When you grow your own vegetables, you learn to wait. When you hang clothes on the line, you learn to pause. There’s beauty in the slowness, and it reminded me that life doesn’t have to move at full speed to be full.
Letting Go of the Guilt
If you’ve ever sat down in the middle of the day and thought, “I should be doing something,” you’re not alone. I used to feel guilty just sitting on the porch with a cup of tea. I’d think of the laundry, the emails, the errands—and I’d convince myself I didn’t deserve a break yet.
But here’s the truth: rest isn’t earned. It’s required. Women our age carry so much. We’ve spent decades caring for others, managing homes, juggling jobs, and keeping families running. That kind of life takes a toll, and pretending we don’t need to recharge doesn’t help anyone. The guilt fades when you start to feel how much better life is when you give yourself permission to slow down.
Little Moments Make a Big Difference
Slowing down doesn’t mean giving everything up or moving to a cabin in the woods. It means choosing to be present, even in the middle of a full life. It’s lighting a candle while you clean the kitchen. It’s saying no to an obligation you don’t really want to do. It’s taking the scenic route home, just because it’s pretty.
I started making space in my day for small joys, and it’s changed everything. In the early morning, I sit by the window with my coffee and listen to the world wake up. I try not to look at my phone right away. In the evening, I take five minutes to step outside and breathe in the fresh air, no matter what kind of day I’ve had. These things aren’t big, but they matter. They bring me back to myself.
Rewriting the Definition of “Productive”
Somewhere along the way, many of us were taught that being busy equals being valuable. That if we aren’t producing, we’re wasting time. But that definition doesn’t serve us anymore. At this point in life, I want to be productive in a way that feeds my soul, not just my schedule.
That means choosing tasks that matter to me. Making a loaf of homemade bread. Working in the garden. Organizing a drawer that’s been bugging me for months. It also means letting go of things that don’t align with my values. I don’t have to say yes to every request. I don’t have to fill every minute. I can work hard and still leave space for rest. That’s real productivity—doing what brings meaning, not just motion.
Connecting With What Matters Most
When you slow down, you start to see what’s really important. You notice the way the light falls across the floor in the late afternoon. You catch your grandchild’s laugh and let it sink in instead of rushing past it. You have longer conversations, richer thoughts, deeper sleep.
For me, slowing down has deepened my relationships. I’m more present with the people I love. I listen better. I’m less snappy and less distracted. I also feel more connected to myself. I don’t feel like I’m chasing my own tail anymore. There’s time to think, to pray, to reflect. That’s something I didn’t even realize I was missing.
A Life That Feels Good, Not Just Looks Good
The world pushes us to do more, look better, stay busy, keep up. But I’ve learned that a beautiful life isn’t one that looks good on social media—it’s one that feels good when you wake up in the morning. Slowing down helps me live that kind of life. It doesn’t mean every day is peaceful or perfect. But it means I’m more in tune with what matters.
When you live slowly and intentionally, your days feel fuller in the best way. Not crowded, but complete. Not rushed, but rich. And that’s the kind of life I want, especially now.
Give Yourself Permission
If you’ve been waiting for someone to tell you it’s okay to slow down, let me be that person. It’s okay. In fact, it’s necessary. You deserve time to breathe, time to rest, time to just be. You’ve earned it—not because you’ve done enough, but because you are enough.
Whether you live in the country or the city, whether your schedule is packed or peaceful, you can find moments to slow down. You can choose to let go of the guilt and embrace a life that feels softer, simpler, and more true. It’s not about doing less—it’s about living better. And the journey starts with one deep breath.
I’m not posting as much here on the blog any more. But, I am trying to share more of my life on Instagram if you’d like to follow.
Ellen is a busy mom of a 24-year-old son and 29-year-old daughter. She owns six blogs and is addicted to social media. She believes that it doesn’t have to be difficult to lead a healthy life. She shares simple healthy living tips to show busy women how to lead fulfilling lives. If you’d like to work together, email info@confessionsofanover-workedmom.com to chat.
