How to Create Balance in a Marriage

Last Updated on October 19, 2023 by Ellen Christian

Do you know how to create balance in a marriage? Do you think it’s even possible? Here are some tips to create a more balanced relationship.

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How to create balance in a marriage

How to Create Balance in a Marriage

It seems like balance is one of those buzz words. You need balance at work and balance at play and balance in your health goals. It only makes sense that you need to have balance in your marriage as well. It’s all too easy to focus on one or two areas of our marriage that we think are most important while we end up neglecting others that should have our attention too.

In marriage, as in life, creating a balance between different areas is vital if we’re going to be happy and healthy. You shouldn’t spend all of your time on one area, while neglecting others, and you shouldn’t lose track of who you area because you are giving too much.

Learning how to create balance in a marriage is a process of trial and error. What works well for me in my relationship, may or may not work well for you in yours. The areas that I struggle with may be different than yours. My hope is that by sharing these tips, I’ll help you think about balance in your marriage.

How to Create Balance in a Marriage

  • Respect each other. Have you ever found yourself being rude to your husband? Or speaking to him in a way you wouldn’t speak to your best friend? Have you ever ridiculed a hobby or interest? Has he done it to you? Try to be supportive of his thoughts, opinions and hobbies, even if they are different than yours.
  • Keep time for you. While it may be tempting to give up all your afternoons with the girls and never go out for a few hours of me time, in order to have a balanced marriage, you need to keep time that’s just for you and your interests.
  • Share. It’s one of the first social skills we teach our children and we need to remember it as adults as well. Share your time, your attention and your favorite things with your spouse.
  • Do things together. Marriage shouldn’t be all work and no play. Take time to do fun things together whether that’s time for a quiet walk in the woods, movie night for just the two of you or a picnic in the park.
  • Be romantic. It’s not all about sex. Spend time romancing each other. Leave a love note on the pillow. Send a card for no reason except to say I love you. Offer a back rub with no strings attached.
  • Don’t expect perfection. Everyone has annoying habits from leaving the toilet seat up to tossing their dirty clothes on the floor. Don’t nag and remind about every bad habit they have.
  • Don’t do it all and don’t expect your partner too. There needs to be cooperation and give and take in a relationship and that includes in the housework and yard work. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, ask for help and be willing to give it when needed as well.

Learning how to create balance in a marriage is something I struggle with at times. Patience is not something I have a lot of and I’m trying to be aware of that. I hope that these tips have helped you become more aware of the areas you might need to work on.


6 thoughts on “How to Create Balance in a Marriage”

  1. Great thoughts! I agree about focusing on the positive and trying not to undermine your partner. It's easy to get caught up in each other's shortcoming - it's more difficult to look beyond on a consistent basis. Great post!
  2. Great advice, Ellen! Balance is something that is often hard to find in a marriage, especially as roles change and partners grow. I love that you say not to nag at every annoying habit, because it is SO easy to get carried away with complaining sometimes. Thanks for being a part of the 2016 March Marriage Challenge! 

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